Oh hi there,
I hope you've had a brilliant week!
So, I recently read an intriguing LinkedIn post about a manager who only hired people with “daddy issues” because they seek validation from male authority figures, making them, in his view, more productive workers!
Now, I'm not sure if the post was a joke as the thinking is, shall we say, somewhat controversial! It did raise a bigger question for me of, 'how do our childhood experiences affect how we show up at work?'
Of course, it's an exaggeration to say that we are our history. However, it is commonly understood that our past and childhood experiences influence how we behave as adults. And, unless we are to remain puppets to our past, our unresolved elements must be brought to consciousness in order to be transformed. Otherwise, we risk repeating patterns that might not serve us. Awareness is the first step to understanding these patterns and making conscious choices that help us thrive.
Take, for example, someone who grew up in a house full of conflict - where arguments were frequent, and tension was high. They might have learned to be the peacemaker, smoothing over conflicts and prioritising others’ emotions. As adults, they could become the ultimate people-pleaser at work, always saying ‘yes,’ taking on extra work, and avoiding confrontation. While being supportive is valuable, constantly putting others first can lead to burnout and feeling undervalued.
Step One: Awareness Recognise where your tendencies come from. Understand that your people-pleasing habits are a learned response to childhood conflict.
Step Two: Set Boundaries Start with small acts of boundary-setting. Say, ‘I can’t take that on right now,’ or ‘I don’t have capacity for that at the moment.’ You’ll realise that prioritising your needs isn’t selfish - it’s necessary.
Step Three: Build Confidence Understand that speaking up doesn’t create conflict; it contributes to balance. Expressing your thoughts shows you as an engaged team member which can build trust.
Childhood experiences shape us, but they don’t have to define us. With awareness and action, we can stop being controlled by our past and start living how we choose.
Have a wonderful week, my friends.
Cate x
Oh hi there,
I hope you've had a brilliant week!
So, I recently read an intriguing LinkedIn post about a manager who only hired people with “daddy issues” because they seek validation from male authority figures, making them, in his view, more productive workers!
Now, I'm not sure if the post was a joke as the thinking is, shall we say, somewhat controversial! It did raise a bigger question for me of, 'how do our childhood experiences affect how we show up at work?'
Of course, it's an exaggeration to say that we are our history. However, it is commonly understood that our past and childhood experiences influence how we behave as adults. And, unless we are to remain puppets to our past, our unresolved elements must be brought to consciousness in order to be transformed. Otherwise, we risk repeating patterns that might not serve us. Awareness is the first step to understanding these patterns and making conscious choices that help us thrive.
Take, for example, someone who grew up in a house full of conflict - where arguments were frequent, and tension was high. They might have learned to be the peacemaker, smoothing over conflicts and prioritising others’ emotions. As adults, they could become the ultimate people-pleaser at work, always saying ‘yes,’ taking on extra work, and avoiding confrontation. While being supportive is valuable, constantly putting others first can lead to burnout and feeling undervalued.
Step One: Awareness Recognise where your tendencies come from. Understand that your people-pleasing habits are a learned response to childhood conflict.
Step Two: Set Boundaries Start with small acts of boundary-setting. Say, ‘I can’t take that on right now,’ or ‘I don’t have capacity for that at the moment.’ You’ll realise that prioritising your needs isn’t selfish - it’s necessary.
Step Three: Build Confidence Understand that speaking up doesn’t create conflict; it contributes to balance. Expressing your thoughts shows you as an engaged team member which can build trust.
Childhood experiences shape us, but they don’t have to define us. With awareness and action, we can stop being controlled by our past and start living how we choose.
Have a wonderful week, my friends.
Cate x
